Feast On Bad Teams Early, See You For Game 7

By Shannon Shark
Posted Sunday, April 5, 2009

The longest and most boring Spring Training in memory has ended, and I have the honor of the Opening Day column.

We've moved into our new home at Citi Field, and despite some obstructed views in the Promenade (watch out if you're in the first three rows) the stadium seems universally loved, and by universally loved even Yankees fans are admitting it's better than the lemon in the Bronx.

The Mets open to an easy schedule, what with the Reds and the Marlins (as Steve Somers might say) before coming home to feast on those jerks the Padres who are making us play a night opener. I hope the Padres lose 121 games in front of 700,000 fans for ruining our opener. (Some union nonsense about not being able to play a day game after a cross-country flight. Waaaah).

So here's what we have...

A first baseman playing for a contract in a ballpark that's going to see about seven home runs all season. I can hear Howie Rose now, “Delgado crushes it to deep right center, and it's caught in front of the 415 sign!”

A second baseman we all hate. Not much at catcher.

Wright, Beltran and Reyes..all they need to be is Wright, Beltran and Reyes and all will be right with the world.

Hopefully Pelfrey and Murphy are what we all think they are (and wouldn't two more home-growns be a great thing for this franchise.)

The bullpen can't possibly blow thirty games again, and K-Rod was as electric as one can be in an exhibition game on Friday night.

Santana is the ace...is Ollie out of shape? Why the heck did you idiots boo him on Saturday? Is John Maine hurt or just a mental case?

Livan looks like one of the great Omar Minaya frugal pickups....but this Sheffield pickup scares me. I worry about chemistry. This is a guy who even Joe Torre couldn't handle. If Jerry threatened to stab Jose Reyes, will he choke Sheffield with his bare hands? A car explosion in the players parking lot?

I think we're going to have a great season. It's fun after all these years to have Red Sox-lite in the Phillies.

I'm predicting the Mets to go all the way....to Game 7 and a loss at home to the Yankees. I think they are both the best in their leagues, but the Yankees starting pitching is more solid than the Mets, and I fear that Flaky Ollie will show up for Game 7. Regardless it will be fun. I hope you're not sitting in an obstructed view when it happens.

You Can read more of Shannon's work at his blog, Mets Police.